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It's Christmastown


Jul 3, 2019

We will drop THE LAST BRIDESMAID (2019) until: A question mark leads to an exclamation point ... THEME ... The bipartisanship ceremony ... Better than the new churn ... The busier oeuvre of Nina Weinman ... Hallmark realism as foreign policy ... Kissinger, Scowcroft, Armitage, Oh my! ... George Mitchell's pipe ... Cast rundown ... Matt Harvey actor ... The Expositional Challenge ... The Magic Mountain ... The Sutton Foster of the Hallmark universe ... Tell your auteurs no sometime ... Jeb's preschool hunt ... Stop whining about your prosperity ... Laying people off without a Gary ... Moh's Hardness Scale ... Plot wrap-up ... Movies on aircraft carriers ... Five months together ... Amazing natural blocking ... Nimitz 1-4 ... Roland Emmerich quit ... Having an adult conversation ... Welcome back to blimp chat ... BREAK ... Spot the Angel: Dual angels, but Kyle can code ... Eat Your Heart Out: Little food; catching Becca eating; normal salad; expensive but authentically annoying wedding; Shame the Cat! ... Pros in the Olympics ... Venus de Milo discount ... The Hallmark Expanded Universe: The Wedding March's Tombstone wedding town; Ike Clanton's defense of marriage; Paul Campbell, the sexless Quantum Lead ... BREAK ... Overdetermined: The joy-or-insurance binary vs. The Herr Settembrini and Herr Naphta dialogues ... Bong hit with your first Libertarian ... BREAK ... Crossover: The Errol Morris Interrotron Wedding Interview ... Robert Strange McNamara vs. Eric R.'s Last Samurai or the Last Starfighter ... The Hallmark Bechdel Test: Yes! ... Letters to Santa: Impostor Syndrome vs. Beth's kind letter and kidney theft and husband's NCAA pool ... Partner Chat: "We're supposed to be on her side?"; quits, archetypes and inclement weather ... Driving with Jeb's great-uncle George and the emergency break on ... Herb Caen ain't worth it ... Rating: 3 ... Visually good, not busy, not a lobby ... Retro Banana Republic ... BREAK ... The Leftovers: Enjoy your one day, dress ... Too hippy? Try the crinoline ... Above-average bridesmaids dresses and jewelry ... Dolores Herbig ... Bryan Fuller: No emergency break ... Remember how your mom is dead? Time to be happy ... Bereavement-card emotional product placement ... Swallow your own poison ... Mark Jean and six episodes of Police Academy: The Series ... Le Loup-Garou du Campus ... Dead air ... Selling insurance to a grinding noise ... Rachel Boston Appreciation Station: Better barbed than beatific ... Show feet, Hallmark ... Shrimping ... BREAK ... Warner Brothers DSC street-sweepers ... The Greatest Generation ... Paul Campbell's gently silly IMDB autobiography ... A dead era of online personal sincerity ... Look dad, might feel cute later ... Narendra Modi ... Pre-kiss vow exchange ... Marrying into a cult ... I'm so your wife right now ... From Hero Dogs to Union Carbide ... Merry Christmas ... • MUSIC: "Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather • "100,000 People," by Philip Glass • "Quantum Leap Theme," by Mike Post • "Magic Mountain," by Blonde Redhead • "Jungle Work," by Warren Zevon • "El Bimbo," by Bimbo Jet, from the Police Academy Soundtrack, composed by Robert Folk • "67 Cities," by Philip Glass • "Orchestral Sports Theme" by Chris Collingwood and Rick Murnane